APA format 4 pagesDiabetes in Native AmericansMUST include     - definition for health disparity (cite source)     - definition for evidence-based practice (cite source)     - CAUSES 

Kristie H. Gentry

EVAN 525 – D02

Recovery Testimony

Dr. David Wheeler

How Do We Define Normal?

In many ways, my life is not one people would identify as normal. I struggle with a hearing loss which divided me from peers during my school years, and then after the onset of Bipolar 1 Disorder, this gap expanded. Still, there are ways to which I can look back and identify the many ways in which Yeshua has helped me to overcome and face the challenges I have had to face. In 1999, when I was saved, even though I still would need to struggle with forgiving myself, I discovered strength and fortitude by continuously utilizing prayer as a catalyst to discuss many of the problems I struggled to hide from the world ready to cast me aside. The account of my life has not been “cherry pie” perfect, something which I discovered very early in life. When looking back, even in the darkest moments, when I could control the darkness of my mind, I would find the strength necessary to continue moving forward. Many times, I tease my middle name of “Hope” was chosen for two reasons: (1) to serve as a reminder of the importance of faith and (2) a guide in my darkest hours. In the clutches of a predominantly silent world and a dark madness few can ever imagine, I knew there had to be a reason and a purpose for the challenges. During the short span of time when I tried to cast my faith aside, I discovered there were even greater darkness and sorrow. When no faith existed, no purpose or drive could answer the questions for many of the difficulties I faced. Then, when I replied to the call to give my life to Yeshua, I once again discovered the missing piece of the puzzle within my heart.

Discovering Hope and Help

During the darkest hours, when I felt utterly alone, ashamed, and broken, hope and faith helped me to recognize the importance of prayer. In the darkness, pray allowed me to identify how my struggles may prove valuable for others. I asked for strength and guidance, as I continually allowed my faith to provide me the necessary “life boat” to recognize no matter the problem, as long as I depended on the Father, time would come that a solution would be revealed. The battle with drug and alcohol addiction would continue to create moments of great weakness, but in those moments, I would enter into prayer as a reminder to myself, I was not alone. I hear the claims of evil and darkness being so rampant, individuals believe there can be no forgiveness from the Father, but my life has proven there is forgiveness. Many times, when we feel our sin is too great, one who has been down a similar path can work to help us understand, forgiveness is available. Furthermore, I can speak from experience that while my sins were numerous and forgiveness seemed impossible, the greatest challenge was learning to forgive myself. In the end, as I gradually came to understand and appreciate the power and strength of YHWH’s forgiveness, it took much longer for me to identify the importance of forgiving myself. My greatest struggle was not apologizing to the ones I had hurt with my inconsiderate actions, but the guilt and discuss I felt within my heart for having been so far gone.

The shift to becoming a follower of Yeshua altered who I was inside and out. It helped me to discover how to forgive others of actions against me, not for them, but for myself. Many times, we struggle to understand how important forgiveness is in light of the healing power of our lives. As a result, we do not see how even the smallest choice not to forgive another makes it even harder for us to forgive ourselves, especially if our actions are even worse in context. Forgiveness does not always have to be spoken, sometimes, it is a personal choice to forgive within the heart. In these actions, we discover hope in many facets of life, and furthermore, we garner strength through the Holy Spirit to continue moving forward, without dwelling in the past.

The Growth of a Meaningful Personal Relationship with Yeshua

Entering into a life more centered around becoming the person YHWH intends us to be, we as a person begin to shift and change. His love, strength, and forgiveness begin to shine through into all areas of our lives. Many times, when entering into the darkness of our soul, it is the ability to turn to Scripture, or lift our struggles up into prayer, that allows the discovery of the “light at the end of the tunnel.” Unlike the times when lost in the past, times of challenge and peril become easier knowing through prayer, we always have one person to turn to and to ask for help. The progression and growth of this relationship determine the abilities we develop to not only move forward but to appreciate better James 1:2-3 – “Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow.”1 It is important to recognize, trials and tribulations are vital to the growth and development of each individuals being molded into the person YHWH intends us to be. In Romans 5:3-4, Scriptures tell us “We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation.” When facing challenges in life, the growth our relationship and faith allow us to persevere and grow into a stronger, better-equipped individual. It is within Scripture one discovers the importance of the personal relationship we strive to establish with the Father. He desires all humanity to enter into a relationship with Him; however, it is our choice if we pursue this relationship with all of our being, or merely allow it to present itself in times of troubles.

A relationship with Yeshua and YHWH must prove the foundation of our life, and the light which guides us in all things. Consider 1 Peter 5:10 – “In his kindness God called you to share in his eternal glory by means of Jesus Christ. So after you have suffered a little while, he will restore, support and strengthen you, and he will place you on a firm foundation.” It is in the growth and development of this personal relationship one can better grow to understand 1 John 1:9 – “But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness.” During one’s spiritual growth, the words of Ephesians 2:8-9 gain greater clarity – “God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God. Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it.” In personal growth and development, it is possible to identify the gifts of the Father and rejoice in His love and mercy. We learn the necessary instructions revealed in Ephesians 4:32 – “Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.” Most importantly, it is in this development, we discover the desire to help others into a relationship with the Father. We want others to know the joy and peace now residing in our hearts. Apply these understanding, one comes to recognize how the growth and purpose of my personal relationship with the Father provide me the strength to forgive and forge ahead, but it also helps to mold and shapes me into the person YHWH created me to become.