Worldview Paper----
10
Feedback on rough, rough drafts of Worldview Papers:Last Update: November 29, 2016
Common Issues to Fix:No rhetorical questions (unless you are quoting one in Plato and Aristotle).
Have tender hearts for your readers who disagree with you. Avoid telling your readers it is impossible to know certain things they think they know. We all have a different epistemology and we are going to disagree. Avoid sounding arrogant. Many brilliant philosophers are going to disagree with you, and you will disagree with them. Explain your view. Some of you wrote assertions like, “The truth is nobody can know x.” You don’t want to say, “Anyone who believes in the Flying Spaghetti monster is an idiot and has lost touch with reality.” You don’t want to make your reader make a face and want to say, “Wait a minute, you can’t assert that for all of us!!!” as they read your paper.
You don’t want to upset Socrates and Plato and Aristotle and Karl Marx and Nietzsche in your paper. Imagine they are reading it. They won’t care if you disagree with their views, they will care if you decide the issue for them.
Imagine they are reading your paper and if they would be annoyed that you tell them it is impossible for them to know it is wrong to kick puppies. Instead say, “Given the evidence, I think that relativism is true and any claim that ‘x is wrong’ like ‘it is wrong to kick puppies’ is a claim about one’s own personal beliefs—there is no objective moral truth there.”
Or, “Since, on my epistemological view that we cannot know things that we cannot touch, taste, hear or smell, Socrates’ view that he is, primarily, a non-physical soul is false. As he explains, “. . . . . . . (4c)” is a nice hope, but I do not think humans are ever justified in believing that we are any more than wonderful creatures made only of matter and energy.”
Philosophy is always done before science is done. Science depends upon philosophy. Let's talk about this (or you can just keep this and put this in your conclusion as a possible contradiction in your epistemology).
If you don't believe in ten controversial philosophical beliefs, you can't do science. You have to believe in logic, math, the existence of moral truths (don't lie about the data), the external world has to exist, our senses have to have access to the external world, and reason has to be possible. All of those philosophical presuppositions are philosophical.
Also, your epistemology that says science is the best source of knowledge is a philosophical view—science doesn’t tell you science is the best source of knowledge (your philosophy does). So it is more important than science.
Student #1
Great introduction. If you add to it, make good paragraphs. Avoid contractions. Not life or death but tons of them can be distracting and a little informal.
Remember to indent paragraphs and put the book titles in italics.
No rhetorical questions in final draft. Rewrite as statements.
You can find some verses or creeds to cite if you want to help you with your views.Great start. Make good paragraphs.
You might want to find some short references to explain your view in a shorter time:
Bible (can do a search on the site):
https://www.biblegateway.com/
or
https://www.blueletterbible.org/ (which also has the Greek)
Creeds of all Christians:
http://christianityinview.com/creeds.html
Catholic Catechism:
http://www.usccb.org/beliefs-and-teachings/what-we-believe/catechism/catechism-of-the-catholic-church/
Do you believe in the Trinity? Jesus' divinity? Explain that. make good paragraphs.
Make sure you don't have long paragraphs.
Student #2
This introduction is fantastic!
I would suggest watching the HISTORY CHANNEL " The Bible" series. I use it when I teach World Religions It does a great job of summarizing the entire Bible in 6 hours. Shockingly good and accurate. Even if it is all false, you will know the common threads and be able to talk about those things with your Christian friends.
Watch that before reading it. And, I would start with the New Testament (Gospel of John).
So sad to hear the loss of your friend. This is the "problem of evil" and the major objection against God's existence.
Rewrite rhetorical questions as statements.
COSMOLOGY:
This first sentence is your view, so explain that. Many Christian and Islamic philosophers disagree with you.
Many Christians and Jews and Muslims think that God used evolution and it can fit with Genesis. If you are God trying to tell people that humans are more valuable than other animals and that God created the world, you might cut out a complex theory of evolution when you explain that to Moses.
Make good paragraphs. Some of these are too long.
Aristotle argued against evolution and he never heard of Genesis. Many atheists think evolution is false, so you can't assume evolution is true. Genesis might be false and evolution might be false. Aliens might have planted organisms on the earth.
Rewrite all of these rhetorical questions as statements.
I think there is a ton of evidence for the major truths of the Bible, so be careful of saying there is no evidence when you aren't aware of it. Study the evidence www.reasonablefaith.org and www.rzim.org and then you can say, "I don't find this evidence convincing."
See that? Don't tell Augustine and Aquinas and Isaac Newton and Galileo and Blaise Pascal and Robert Boyle that there is no evidence when they give evidence and are convinced by the evidence.
You can say, "I think the evidence is weak and Galileo and Newton are wrong in believing it to be true."
Remember, don't tell us what we can or cannot prove with this bald assertion. Just tell us your view. Saying these things will annoy Socrates and Nietzsche and Hume and Plato and Aquinas.
Catholicism is a species of Christianity so fix that. You mean different denominations of Christianity--all denominations of Christianity agree about the big issues. There are little issues that divide denominations, but it is still the same worldview.
Many atheists think that Darwinism is false, so be careful of saying they are dumb to think evolution is false when you haven't studied what they have. They might be wrong, but you don't want to offend your reader. Just tell them you think the evidence is in favor of evolution against panspermia and progressive creation or theistic evolution.
Take a history of the philosophy of science course and you will see how whole theories are thrown out every 150 years. Cut out the "lie" bit about science. Science does "lie" sometimes--we get all kinds of things wrong in science every year and every century. Just look at how it has "lied" in history over and over. Who knows what theories we will throw out in 100 years? No scientist has ever known in her time. Yet it always happens.
Nietzsche is going to say all scientists lie all the time and we cannot know any scientific truths because they come out of the mouth of people who just want grant money and dates and prestige.
So, cut a lot of this section out. Don't cite your friend who hasn't studied as the #1 representative of Christianity when you have guys like Augustine and Aquinas and J.P. Moreland and Ravi Zacharias to read first.
And, don't assume that all atheists believe evolution. They don't. Read Uncommon Dissent: Intellectuals who find Darwinism Unconvincing to see these atheist arguments against Darwinism.
Your friend needs to read Socrates and Augustine - sharp minds and tender hearts for those with whom you disagree. There is no harm in learning every religion, every view and arguments for/against every view. Explain to her John Stuart Mill’s principle. It is important for Christians who are taught the intellectual life is not important.
I would also read Acts 17 with her. Look at how Paul dealt with people that disagreed with him (the Epicurean and Stoic Greek philosophers). That might save your friendship.
Also, remember she should endorse I Peter 3:15 to be able to give a reason for the hope within her with love and respect. Christians often get defensive when they don't know the evidence for their views, and the evidence against their views.
Remember, many Christian philosophers think God used evolution to create our bodies (e.g. Richard Swinburne is the best on this if you read EVOLUTION OF THE SOUL).
So, thin some of this out. Lots of great content to keep in this section, but some needs to be cut!
On the right track!
Student #2.5
Good intro, but I have some questions.
People taught you things that they thought was true--was that "forced" upon you? Science teachers do the same—they might be wrong as well. Do they “force” science on you? They might. Just be careful with this wording.
Questioning is good! Jesus, Paul, and Peter encouraged questioning and they thought you shouldn't be a Christian if you didn't think the evidence for it was true.
Careful of dismissing what Jesus and Augustine and Aquinas said as, "some spiritual being living in the sky telling me what to do."
As I have argued, maybe Jesus was insane or a liar, but you can test some of his moral claims and his spiritual disciplines of moral growth and spiritual growth.
My only issue is the dismissiveness here. Since most worldviews do not say to "forgive your enemies and pray for them," we can test that and see if it does promote moral growth. It might not and maybe we should hate and kill our enemies. But it is a testable view.
THEOLOGY:
Good! But Aristotle would say that he believed in God for 5 arguments and not because he thought God cared about humans at all. You give the Freudian and Marxist view that people invent God, but be careful--people can say that you run away from God because of these emotional needs that you have.
See that? Deconstructing (or giving psychological reasons for belief in something) is not helpful. Augustine, Socrates, Plato, and Aristotle argued for God's existence apart from psychology and an emotional need for a God.
God might or might not exist, but there is a lot of evidence for God. Maybe that evidence isn't convincing to you, but to say there is none other than emotional needs is something Plato and Aristotle would be a problem for them.
See that? Email me if that isn't clear. So the soul is energy? Explain that a bit more. This is contrary to Darwinism, but you might be right. Great start! You are on the way to an A!
Student X
Remember that it is "deconstruction" to say that Plato and Aristotle and Socrates believed in God because it comforted them. They would disagree and say that we have rational, philosophical arguments (reasons to believe) God exists and they overwhelm the arguments that God does not exist.
Good content to work into paragraphs with quotes.
Student Y
Cut that first sentence and just jump into your personal story. Give more content as to what you believed as a child to now.
EPISTEMOLOGY:
Cut that first sentence, or give more content--why is it important?
THEOLOGY:
Put this personal story in the introduction. Just describe your current view here.
Is it coherent to believe in a "higher entity" and be an atheist?
Rewrite all rhetorical questions as statements.
Good! The problem is that space, time, matter, and energy came into existence at the Big Bang. Therefore it might be hard to say that aliens (who are in space, time and are made of matter and energy) could start the Big Bang.
No philosopher says that is an option. The Big Bang just happened with no explanation, or God started the Big Bang.
Souls could exist, but this is more compatible with Theism than Atheism. Mention this problem in your paper.
THANATOLOGY:
Christianity says that good works don't get you into heaven and bad works get you into hell. Maybe you believed that, but that is not the New Testament view.
Salvation is by grace through faith (Ephesians 2:8-9) and not by good deeds as Socrates thought. You can mention that verse and say you didn't understand the Christian view of salvation and that was your personal belief (that you now think is false).
You might be right about that view of salvation, but it isn't Christianity.
Good stuff! Just need more quotes and philosophers to interact with.
Very good! Rewrite all rhetorical questions as statements.
Student Z
make a paragraph under "INTRODUCTION"
Where in Mexico? (unless it is a secret)
"C" for Catholic.
Great start on intro, but distinguish between your beliefs and "being a good Catholic". Let me explain:
Barack Obama can believe everything in the Democrat party, but he might not push every policy the Democrats want him to believe for practical reasons.
So, we can distinguish beliefs (do you believe Christianity) from a practical reality (don't do all the practices that make you a "great" Catholic Christian).
Make sure you make good paragraphs.
Could find a verse to defend your view in THEOLOGY section.
Remember the New Testament view of faith is TRUST IN THINGS YOU HAVE GOOD REASON TO BELIEVE ARE TRUE.
If you mean "blind faith" then explain that (blind faith is different from Jesus, Peter, Paul's view of faith as a well-justified trust).
very, very good start! More beef and polish and conclusion and you will be fine
Good intro, but Jesus said that you don't have to go to mass at all--there were mo masses in his day. Jesus wanted us to love God and do the spiritual disciplines (fasting, worship, prayer, fellowship, confession, service celebration, study, silence, solitude, simplicity, etc.) Mass might help with some of those things, but it isn't 1/100 of what Jesus taught us to grow
Student #3
Great intro, but break it into better paragraphs when possible.
No rhetorical questions in final draft.
Be good to find some Bible verses to splatter through your paper when they illustrate your view. cite them correctly.
Is this plagiarism in the Political Philosophy section? Just use the text for Socrates.
Cite the videos if you want for pol phil.
Okay. You keep on this and clean this up and you are on right track for an A.
Great start!
Student #4
EXCELLENT content in intro, but make good readable paragraphs. This is a two-page paragraph. ;)
No rhetorical questions.
"evolutionize" isn't a word ;)
Platonic dialogues in italics.
Cite Plato correctly.
Cite after you mention Socrates' views.
spelling and grammar
The external world is an illusion? Expand on that in final draft. VERY, very interesting (many of my Buddhist friends believe this, and one of my Christian friends)!
Student #5
Great intro!
Epistemology:
Make better paragraphs. No huge paragraphs.
THEOLOGY
Look up that Jadakiss lyric and include it. cite it properly.
No rhetorical questions. Make good paragraphs. Tighten some of these up. You might find things to cut.
Need quotes from Plato and Aristotle.
Use the Bible if it helps.
• Bible (can do a search on the site):
https://www.biblegateway.com/
or
https://www.blueletterbible.org/ (which also has the Greek)
• Creeds of all Christians:
• http://christianityinview.com/creeds.html
• Catholic Catechism:
• http://www.usccb.org/beliefs-and-teachings/what-we-believe/catechism/catechism-of-the-catholic-church/
Great start! You just need a few quotes and to clean and tighten and make good paragraphs.
Avoid too many contractions. Write some of them out.
Student #6)
Catholic is capitalized.
Also, it might hope to focus on specific beliefs that you dismiss within religion (which means worldview).
Jesus, the Buddha, Marx, Socrates, Muhammad, Aristotle, etc. all had views on God, metaphysical anthropology, and ethics. One (or none) of them may be wholly right, but they agree on some points.
You are free to disagree with all of them, but every worldview/religion has some truths in it, so to wholesale dismiss all worldviews might not be helpful.
Epistemology:
Good description! Remember to replace "religion" with "worldview". Atheistic worldviews (Marxism, Nazism) have killed hundreds of millions more people than God-based worldviews.
Political Philosophy:
Excellent! I would make better paragraphs and thin some things out in this section, but the content is very good!
Student #7
Great intro, but tell us about your skepticism now.
Add section headings: EPISTEMOLOGY so we can follow you more easily.
Add quotes of Socrates. Socrates never saw God so you might want to modify that claim about him.
Very good start! Section headings and more quotes from our philosophers and maybe even bring in the Bible and explain where you disagree with specific verses.
Student #8
Was Catholicism "pushed" on you or "taught" to you? We might say the same of history and science and math. We might disagree with science, and history, and math, but we might not say it was "forced" on us. You be the judge.
Wow. Great personal story. Break it up into readable paragraphs.
THEOLOGY
Cut out the "as i have mentioned previously"
Lots of people have invented worldviews/religions and we can tell that many are obviously false.
Good quote of Baggini, but cite it properly.
Student #10
INTRO:
You have the intuitions of Jesus who loved all of the unlovable in his world.
Put the dialogue titles in italics. Cite it properly.
This stuff about the crazy Westboro Baptists (who do not read how Jesus loved the unloved) might be important, but I'm not quite sure what your readers would think. Up to you.
Just say (Apology, 29d) but put Apology in italics.
Can thin this section out. Cut the sentence that says, "... sometimes my thoughts wander..."
Oooh. Interesting view that science trumps moral knowledge. Does the fact that science changes every 100 years change anything? We have believed that killing innocents (like Socrates) and kicking puppies have been true for thousands of years, while science always changes.
Just a thought.
THEOLOGY:
Good! You might want to reference Bible verses if it helps you clarify your views. Up to you.
Your view is close to C.S. Lewis with people being able to leave Hell by choice to go to heaven. See his book, THE GREAT DIVORCE.
good stuff to work with for final paper! Great start!
