Read the following article from Unit II’s Required Reading (located in the Unit II Study Guide): Lytle, T. (2015). Confronting conflict. HR Magazine, 60(6), 26-31. Retrieved from https://libraryresour

B u t ig n o r i n g it c a n b e .

By Tamara Lytle A t a h o sp ital, employee co n flicts c a n hap p en am id life-or-death situations. N o one benefits when these conflicts are ignored—n ot the staff, not the managers and certainly n ot the patients.

While it’s a natu ral hum an tendency to avoid uncom fortable conflict w ith others, th a t tactic w on’t work in the long term.

“It’s like a crazy song you can’t get out of your head,” says D an Bjerknes, director of H R opera­ tions at Catholic H ealth Initiatives/Mercy M edi­ cal Center in Williston, N .D ., who has a m aster’s degree in counseling and previously worked as a conflict management consultant.

By th e tim e a clash comes to H R ’s a tte n ­ tio n , i t ’s often too late— such as w hen a valu­ able employee is quitting. Even seemingly small conflicts can be im portant because they’re often really about larger issues. > J u l y / A u g u s t 2 0 1 5 HR Magazine 2 7 ILUST RALTOILUSTRII AISONBTYECKF K F ! F " # $ KF $ % & K ' I F ( ##F # K ! & K( $ K(F K K% % $K # K F ( FK#( ) " *K +F " K,K( # F K - E% F" F $ # KF$ . K # K % K% UFKK" / ' Y K! %( & ( K & $ F K #' 0B 1 KF%K( # F K KF$ . K "2 +F " K, (KF K Crucial Conversations: Tools fo r Talking W hen Stakes Are High (McGraw-Hill, 2011).

U n d e r s ta n d in g th e r e a s o n s b e h in d w orkplace conflicts can help H R profes­ sionals tackle problems before— or after— a c o n flict tu r n s into a face-off betw een departm ents th a t refuse to w ork together or a screaming match between colleagues.

A good place to s ta rt is by realizing that, even though people may shy away from it, conflict is actually norm al and healthy. In fact, many believe it’s a vital ingredient to organizational success. Experts have found th at the most effective teams are those in which members feel safe enough to disagree w ith one another. A culture where dissent is allowed, or even encouraged, can spur innovation, diversity of thought and better decision-making.

“ Conflict suggests the way you’ve been doing things is not the way it’s going to be forever,” says Casey Swartz, H R m anager at CTLGroup in Skokie, 111. “You don’t w an t to hire a bunch of clones.” A ccording to M ichael W oodw ard, a n o rg an izatio n al psy­ chologist in the N ew York City area, the challenge is in figur­ ing out which conflicts are healthy and which ones are harm ful.

“Unhealthy conflict is when it becomes personal and emotional.

Then your judgment gets clouded,” W oodward says. By contrast, good conflict can lead to higher levels of trust. If people see th at it’s OK to challenge the boss, they can question the status quo, which is better for the company.

Beneath th e Surface Difference is at the heart of conflict, so it’s im portant to explore areas where people often don’t align.

C o n f lic t in g p r io r itie s . Some fights are over resources such as budgets; others erupt from incompatible goals or reactions to structural change in the company.

At Black Butte Coal Co. in southw est W yoming, a w arehouse supervisor an d a m a in te n a n c e m an ag er were clashing so severely over policies and procedures th at they were frequently yelling at each other.

The fights worsened until the tw o dep art­ ments didn’t w ant to work together, recallsAm anda DeBernardi, SHRM-CP, the com pany’s H R manager.

In fact, the feuding parties’ manager was ready to fire them both. Both had strong goals for their departm ents but had lost sight of the bigger picture of w h at was good for the company, DeBernardi says.

She found help in Grenny’s book on difficult conversations.

She sat the warehouse supervisor and maintenance m anager in a conference room w ith a blank piece of paper in front of them.

Each person had his say w ithout interruption as the other took notes rather th an presenting a different side of the story. DeBer­ nardi used a white board to categorize the problems and pressed both to brainstorm solutions. The employees aren’t exactly lunch buddies now, but the process worked. DeBernardi’s only regret is n o t mediating the situation sooner.

“The key thing is the participants knowing they are respon­ sible for the results and they are the ones developing the solution,” she says. “I ’m here to facilitate, and th a t’s all I will do.” She esti­ mates th a t she spends at least 30 percent of her time dealing w ith workplace conflicts.

M any fights over resources can be avoided when people per­ ceive th a t they are operating in an environm ent of plenty— in When Should HR Step In?

HR professionals and conflict management experts recommend that HR get involved in workplace con­ flicts when:

• Employees are threatening to quit over the prob­ lem. Recruiting and training are expensive; it's often cheaper to w ork out a solution.

• Disagreements are getting personal, and respect betw een employees is being lost.

• Conflicts are affecting morale and organizational success.

1 1 '■ W B. ■ i ^ ■ ■■■.*■"■ --f-|--- other words, where everyone has w hat they need to operate effec­ tively, says Lindred Greer, assistant professor of organizational behavior at Stanford Graduate School of Business. N ote th a t the key is creating the perception of abundance— so solutions are possible even w hen acquiring more resources is n o t an option.

T h in k in g creatively is one way to do this. For example, if tw o departm ents are fighting over a small training budget, H R might offer to conduct in-house training so both can benefit.

C o n flic tin g p e r s p e c tiv e s . In an increasingly global and diverse workplace, sometimes the h e a rt of the problem is th a t people differ from each o ther in age, gender, ethnicity or p e r­ sonality type.

T h a t’s something M arcia Reynolds, an organizational psy­ chiatrist w ith Arizona-based Covisioning LLC, has witnessed. C a s e y S w a r t z A m a n d a D e B e r n a r d i 2 8 HR Magazine J u l y / A u g u s t 2 0 1 5 ILUSTR AUS ONBY OIIEST UNC LNKSF FILS IF USF UST YI F ST I SN S N UI F F LUS E ITF F NFC IE N FSC NBI L LUS N LY I U ITKR S N SC UST ISTBSNT F NFC F S B S F LTY F FS NTIN US R ! ULB B SFL I IT IF UI LI SL LUS S SI S LI ITK LI SLUST"# $ N N NY R % SL N FS Y LSE LU NL S US K L LI UI LUS IF& LT B L IF I SN U ST IF" U U US SC LUS OIIEST LI TS I F 'S UST I SN S( N IE UESFL R ! N TS L I LU N L IF L" % N I CSS ISC N ESFLIT U TI TNE LU N L N T ) S F F N LU I CST ITKST " SFNB F YI F ST ITKST LI N F N BSLLST FCST& LNFC F I LUS N S I I CST I SN S ( SST SF SR ! TS SFL $I SLY IT E NF %S I T S ) NFN SE SFL TSY I FC LU N L *+ ST SFL I SE IYSS TN F K TS S L LTSNLE SFL I N SE IYSS NL N SS # N LUS LI N LIT F ,IB NL N L IFR C onflicting assu m p tion s. One of the biggest drivers of con­ flict is when people misinterpret others’ intentions. The introvert who stays quiet during an entire meeting and brings up a prob­ lem at the end is not trying to sabotage a co-worker; th a t behav­ ior simply aligns w ith his personality type. A change in seating arrangem ents in the office isn’t a personal attack on someone, just a reorganization th a t may not have been thought th rough.

Someone w ho’s n ot acting according to a person’s stereotyped e x p e c ta tio n s— like a w o m an w h o ’s very assertive an d th u s behaves in a way th a t contradicts traditional notions of feminin­ ity—may just be being herself. > To get a sense of how diverse perspectives color people’s percep­ tions, she asked leaders at a global com pany she was consult­ ing w ith to participate in an activity in which they were blind­ folded and asked to describe the puzzle pieces in th e ir hands.

She observed as people gave descriptions so different th a t they couldn’t figure o u t they were holding the same piece.

“Conflict is inevitable because we’re hum an beings and come from different backgrounds,” Reynolds says. T h a t’s why organi­ zations need to remember to bring people together to get to know each other, she points out.

B rian Scala, an H R adm in istrato r, repeatedly saw genera­ tional clashes in his job at Vince and Associates Clinical Research Inc. in Overland Park, Kan. The Baby Boomers and members of Generation X saw the M ille n n ia l as lazy w ith p o o r w ork eth ­ ics, while the M ille n n ia l viewed th eir older colleagues as less adaptable to change.

In one instance, tw o lab workers from different generations who performed the same job came to H R complaining about eachW h e n S h o u ld You S e e k O u ts id e Help?

While it's better to address workplace conflicts as soon as possible and at a local level, sometim es you need out­ side help from a mediator, arbitrator or attorney. Experts say those situations include the following:

• When potential legal issues are involved, such as alle­ gations of discrimination or harassment.

• When the HR department doesn't have the time or training to provide the conflict resolution assistance needed.

• When there are patterns of recurring issues.

• When the flare-ups are becoming abusive or resem­ ble bullying.

• When a manager needs retraining that can't be done in-house.

• When the environment is so toxic it's time to get everyone offsite so the office doesn't trigger continuing negative responses.

LI 10 Steps to Resolving Conflict Schedule a meeting to address the problem, preferably at a neutral place.

Set ground rules. Ask all parties to treat each other w ith respect and to make an effort to listen and understand others' views.

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I 0 .Ask each participant to describe the conflict, including desired changes. Direct participants to use " I" statements, not "you" statements. They should focus on specific behaviors and problems rather than people.

Ask participants to restate what others have said.

Summarize the conflict based on w hat you have heard and obtain agreement from participants.

Brainstorm solutions. Discuss all of the options in a positive manner. Rule out any options that partici­ pants agree are unworkable.

Summarize all possible options for a solution.

Assign further analysis of each option to individual participants.

Make sure all parties agree on the next steps.

Close the meeting by asking participants to shake hands, apologize and thank each other for working to resolve the conflict.

S o u r c e : S o c i e t y f o r H u m a n R e s o u r c e M a n a g e m e n t .

J u l y / A u g u s t 2 0 1 5 HR Magazine 2 9 ILUSTRII AISONBTYE f 1 ^rl )• l P V H # ^ 1 r X ' t s'awfip / vC \ V / Too often, people th in k th a t “anything in disagreement with my belief is intended as a personal affront,” W oodward says. “We like to ascribe meaning to everything th a t happens. But we often confuse our interpretations about the beliefs of others w ith their actual intent. We’re all self-centered th a t way.” M oreover, telling people n o t to take conflicts personally w o n ’t w ork. Regardless of any such disclaim ers, people take things personally ab out 70 percent of the time, according to a meta-analysis of many surveys by Greer, the Stanford professor.

But w h a t may help is to simply acknowledge people’s feel­ ings, according to Reynolds, au th o r of The D isco m fo rt Zone:

H o w Leaders Turn D ifficult Conversations into Breakthroughs (Berrett-Koehler, 2014). For example, if someone was irate that his project w asn’t chosen for funding, the author would say: “It sounds like you feel like it’s a decision about you personally.” C o n f lic t i n g t o le r a n c e s . Conflict experts and H R practitio­ ners say employees have differing levels of com fort w ith address­ ing conflict. Too often, discomfort causes conflicts to be avoided entirely. And th a t’s not good.C onflict avoidance can lead to real blowups w hen one per­ son can’t hold it in any longer. Dani Kimlinger, SHRM-SCP, an H R and organizational psychology leader at the business psy­ chology firm M IN E S & Associates in L ittleton, Colo., recalls how colleagues in adjoining cubicles at a bank were locked in a silent battle for six months. The w om an felt her tu r f was being invaded but wouldn’t talk about it—-or anything else—w ith the man next door who was causing her consternation. She rolled her eyes at him in meetings, m aking him feel disrespected. W hen she finally lit into him, she felt th a t he should already know w hat was wrong— but he didn’t.

In counseling the w om an, Kimlinger instructed her to s ta rt small, by saying good m orning to the m an. Conflict resolution generally works about 80 percent of the time, Kimlinger says, but in this case, it didn’t. The w om an ended up leaving the company after conflicts w ith other people.

At a previous employer, Swartz coached a m anager w ith an employee who felt micromanaged. She suggested th at the m an ­ ager set up a weekly report th at would allow the worker to keep 3 0 HR Magazine J u l y / A u g u s t 2 0 1 5 ILU STRR AONTBYUE TO CLKI LU CKR ETAOF CAILT I TORIKOI SUAOF U UBUE CAIL URIATOR Y TRI UUB TOU LKR RTYU TON A I ILU BU KTAEAOF O LAR STT BUOO EUNAOUR K ! B AK TOUBRKIATO" KR TOU IL K I LKR LAFL RIKUR C AIL UYTIATO AOT UE KOE AO CLA L UT U KBU AU IT EARKFBUU #I EAUR RLTC IL KI AO BUKRUE BTE IAAI KOE UOFKFUYUOI KBU TBBU KIUE C AIL ILU RLTBIOURR TN IAYU SUICUUO AEUOIAN AOF K BT S $ UY KOE EAR RRAOF AI !N T ETOI IK AI T I T K I AI T I" BUOO CKBOR Encouraging Trust Creating a culture of tru st is a crucial job for H R . “Try to make sure w hen people come to you [the issue] doesn’t just disappear,” Swartz says. Below are some tips for building trust, encouraging good conflict, and preventing or addressing the bad kind:

S u r v e y e m p l o y e e s . Sw artz conducts an n u a l engagement surveys an d has loads of conversations w ith employees in the interim. Each year, Bjerknes also surveys employees about how well conflict is being handled at the medical center. The results identify departments th a t have widespread problems so he knows where training and intervention are needed.

C a t c h p e o p l e d o i n g t h i n g s r i g h t . W oodward tells m anag­ ers to seek out opportunities to acknowledge and praise employ­ ees. Doing so creates an environment where people feel com fort­ able bringing up problems.

W e lc o m e d i s s e n t . M anagers should encourage dissent th a t’s focused on tasks, strategies an d mission. Sometimes a retreat w ith an outside facilitator is the best way to get beyond surface conversations.

C r e a t e d i v e r s e t e a m s . Create w ork team s w hose m em ­ bers have diverse expertise, ways of thinking and backgrounds.

Related Reading • Getting to Yes: Negotiating A greement Without Giving In (Penguin Books, 2011) by Roger Fisher, William L. Ury and Bruce Patton.

• Fish!: A Remarkable Way to Boost Morale and Improve Results (Hyperion, 2000) by Stephen C.

Lundin, Harry Paul and John Christensen.

• The D iscomfort Zone: H o w Leaders Turn Difficult Conversations into Breakthroughs (Berrett-Koehler, 2014) by Marcia Reynolds.

• Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking when Stakes Are High (McGraw-Hill, 2011) by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan and Al Switzler.____^ > # 1 n i» * W B I I I p III HiAppointing a ro tating devil’s advocate is a good way to stir up productive conflict.

C r e a t e a c c o u n t a b i l i t y . This is a conflict prophylactic, since m any fights arise from a lack of clarity over w ho has the final authority to make a decision. M aking sure th a t roles are well- established and communicated prevents problems from arising.

E n c o u r a g e p e o p l e t o m a n a g e t h e i r o w n c o n f l i c t s . Tell employees to work out conflict at the level it happens, instead of pushing it up the organizational chain. Doing so will give people confidence th a t they are capable of handling these issues on their own. “It doesn’t help the culture of our organization if I drop in and fix the problem and get back out,” Bjerknes says. “We have 500 employees. It’s n o t possible for me to fix all the problems.” A fter people address th e ir ow n conflicts, th e m an ag er or departm ent leader should follow up to make sure n o t only th a t the im m ediate problem has been solved b ut also th a t the ro o t cause has been addressed, Grenny says.

P r o v i d e t r a i n i n g . H R can help people learn the skills they need to handle conflict by sending them to courses or recom ­ mending helpful books. Conflicts tend to become emotionally fraught when someone chooses not to focus on the issue at hand but rather to question another person’s competency, autonomy or integrity. Bjerknes advises people to choose the right time to have a difficult conversation and to prepare in advance the three most im portant things they w ant to say about the conflict.

“My objective is to be a good coach,” he says. “At the end of the day, the coach is not out there playing. You hope they will use the things you’ve taught them .” DO Tamara Lytle is a freelance writer based in the Washington, D.C., area.

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