Can this be probably edited. the advised correction was bolded in red.

Gbenga

Rationale Essay

Goals and Contexts

Hello, my name is Gbenga, born to a middle-class family in Nigeria. I grew up believing in hard work and to make my family proud. I was born in the commercial capital of Nigeria, which is now the 3rd best emerging cities in Africa, Lagos, Nigeria. I was attending an average school which suited the class we belonged to in the society in Nigeria, West Africa. Interestingly, I came to the United States when I was twelve years old. Coming to the United States did not deter my dream, but only motivated me further to excel, since I couldn’t have come this far to settle for less.

In America, I had to adjust to a new environment and culture and found myself surprisingly dealing with some new issues I never imagined existed. Being a determined individual, my passion for business had been very high and I have always been ready to grab any opportunity that will make me thrive in that area with both hands firmly. When I was fourteen, I started a little computer repair business where I fixed minor computer issues and earned a small income. At that point I had discovered that I am a business person and I see myself thriving in the business sector. It got to a point I told myself that if I got a federal job it wouldn’t stop me from pursuing my dream because I had discovered my potentials and aspirations a long time ago. After graduating high school, I attended New York City College of Technology. I later left and transferred to Kingsborough Community College. I didn’t qualify for financial aid because I was undocumented. It was hard paying for school fees out of pocket and keep up with my bills. The burden became too much and overwhelming so I left school for a while to get myself situated.

After getting my green card, I joined the US Military which I’m currently still serving in. I was fortunate to come across Suny Empire State College (ESC) through a fellow soldier that shares my same goals and determination. I decided to attend ESC and study Business because I am passionate about it and I always want to develop myself in that aspect. I was assigned to my mentor Nancy Mangona and really appreciate all the help and support she provided in developing my degree programs.

I plan to pursue an Associate in Science degree in Business, Management and Economics with a concentration in Business. I will continue my education and obtain my Bachelor of Science degree in Business, Management and Economics with a concentration in Business Management (matriculation date Spring 2018). I hope to be able to achieve my MBA in the nearest future. I am also willing to take certification courses on project management. I am interested in project management because it has proven to be impactful in my business development. Project management has gradually been a strategy used by organizations to build their plans to attain their goals. Since I’m also interested in real estate, my goal is to use the knowledge and experience I gained to open my own property management company.

Hi Gbenga,

You are off to a great start. I made some changes with your Goals and Contexts section for better flow-please review above. In this section, you need to tell readers of your essay, the degrees you are seeking. The next section of the essay is Professional Expectations. In this part, you research positions or fields you are interested in and what skills the profession expects you to have. After that we will compare other college programs to your programs (AS and BS). Then we will address the most important section of Area of Study Guidelines. From there, there is only general education and a conclusion.

Example of Professional Expectations

Professional Expectations

When researching what course-work I wanted to take, I utilized SUNY Empire State College's website to determine the courses that I would like to pursue in order to fit the concentration I desired. There are no straight forward registered area for an Associate degree with a concentration in Public Administration, like I desired, but my mentor, Nancy Mangona, was able to help me select courses along the way that properly fit the concentration I sought after. It is important to me to have a bachelor’s degree in Business, Management and Economics, but even more so important that I catered my concentration to coincide along my career path of Public Administration. By looking at job postings on Statejobsny.com, I have been able to also research what type of degree, skills and qualifications are required for the profession I desire. Now that I am working as an Employee Relations Associate, my goal is to advance to an Assistant Director of Employee Relations position. If a position were to open up within my agency, I would be able to apply and transfer to an Assistant Director position once I’ve completed my bachelor’s degree. In order to succeed as an Assistant Director of Employee Relations, I would need to have numerous years of experience, which I will have by working in my current position within the agency but will also need to have a bachelor’s degree. Many of the necessary job requirements for the Employee Relations Associate, also fall within the role of the Assistant Director position. The skills and qualifications that are required for these positions include strong communication Jillisa S. Morehouse 3 skills (written and verbal), human relation skills, knowledge of labor and employee relations, knowledge of unions, and organizational development. W