Hey there, I hope you have a great day and I want you to write about a 10-12 page research essay. Also, you can use up to 3 pictures. I will expect you to send me a draft or the unfinished work first

Different teachers have different issues with writing. In my time teaching, I have come across some terms and phrases that I push students to avoid because they lack clarity. Usually, these phrases can be deleted or replaced to form a much stronger and more descriptive statement.

Please reflect on each of these then search them out and replace them in your paper.

Personal stories and experiences are fine with me. Some teachers say to avoid "I" completely, but often times memoirs can add a strong connection and credibility to the topic. In the study of folklore, such stories might be important, too, when considering how information was collected. For instance, in our textbook, an example is given of a woman collecting tales from cowboys. She had to clarify that in order to collect the stories she needed to spend time with the cowboys, which meant drinking whiskey. Explaining such a detail is essential in understanding the collection of such stories.

When an essay starts to talk about the process of thinking, writing, or talking about the content of the essay, I call this self-reflecting. Avoid self-reflecting.

Some statements included in such weak phrases include:

I think, I will discuss, I will argue, this paper will prove, what I have discussed earlier, in my opinion, this paragraph will be about, in my opinion, in conclusion….

Most of the time, you can delete these phrases for stronger statements.

Example:

I think that the game of Bloody Mary represents the fear teens have of being isolated.

Bloody Mary represents the fear teens have of being isolated.

Avid referring to the audience directly at all times. Such incidents often make unfair or even offensive assumptions about the audience, which causes them to stop reading your paper. Replace it with the person or group you are actually referencing.

Example 1:

You need to pay attention to what your children do online. -- Telling parents they are not doing a good job at parenting usually comes across as offensive.

Parents can spend time monitoring their child's online behavior to ensure they do not get into trouble. -- No assumptions are made, but suggestions are given.

Example 2:

Our history of believing in Greek mythology has influenced the names of the months. -- Not everyone reading the paper will have the same ancestral history, and not all readers will have the same religious beliefs.

Greek mythology has influences the names of the months.

A pronoun replaces a noun, and sometimes readers do not understand which noun it refers to. I already explained why self-reflection and referencing the reader should be avoided, but other pronouns should always be questioned

We are then left with the pronouns of the third person POV. These are he, she, it, and they. Always double check to ensure these terms clearly reference another term.

Example 1:

Bob, Sam, and Tim went to his house. -- The owner of the house is unclear.

Tim showed Bob and Sam the way to his house.

Example 2:

The game of Bloody Mary allows them to test their fears. -- Who is testing their fears?

The game of Bloody Mary allows children to test their fears.

Omit these words from your vocabulary. They are placeholders when a writer does not know what they actually want to say. Ask yourself what you're really trying to say or referring to and make it clear.

Example:

The stuff kids do while playing Bloody Mary represent a lot of things.

The rituals performed by kids during Bloody Mary represent the traditions of cultural practice.

These terms can be used without a problem, but try not to use by themselves.

Make sure they refer to something specific, not just a general idea or content that was mentioned earlier but is now unclear.

Example:

Princess Mononoke represents several different changes in Japanese culture including gender equality and technological development in a society that was originally focused on nature. This is why Princess Mononoke changes that.

Princess Mononoke represents several different changes in Japanese culture including gender equality and technological development in a society that was originally focused on nature. This focus on nature is why Princess Mononoke changes traditional myths.

Some weak language will creep up in everyone's writing, but if you try to avoid it, then you can prevent nightmares like the following:

I am going to discuss things that happen during Bloody Mary and how they suggest you have stuff happening in your life. This is why they play the game so often and why they like this stuff, and she claims it's a thrilling thing that challenges them for that.

I count over 10 issues in these two sentences, which causes them to make very little sense. I would suggest rewriting them with clearer thoughts.

We've covered basic grammar and sentence structures already, so now it's time to go over a few pieces of punctuation that are a bit more complicated. I save these to talk about because they are not necessary to write clearly in English. Furthermore, some forms of writing actually discourage their usage since they can appear too formal, academic, or even boring. If you don't understand how these are used, do not feel obligated to use them. Still, understanding them can be beneficial. They are semicolons, colons, em-dashes, and ellipses.

There are two ways to use a semicolon:

1. As a semicolon--this situation is when you link two complete sentences together because they are closely related.

Sally did not eat dinner; she is allergic to shellfish.

--"Sally" is the subject of the first part of the sentence, and "did not eat" is the verb.

--"She" is the subject of the second independent clause, and "is" would be the verb.

Technically, you could use a period or a comma and one of the FANBOYS to connect these independent clauses, but some writers prefer the way the sentence sounds when it is structured with a semicolon.

Remember, there are many ways to say the same information in different ways, which allows writers to have unique voices.

2. As a super comma--this situation is when a list uses commas in it. It might be a list of lists, but usually, I see it as a list with large numbers (i.e. 1,000,000) or cities, states, and countries.

The adventure will take us to Cleveland, Ohio; Houston, Texas; Boise, Idaho; Portland, Oregon; and Las Angelas, California.

The use of a semicolon as a super comma allows readers to understand each city and state as a single item.

Without the super commas, it might look as if there are twice as many stops.

A colon indicates a complete sentence has been stated and more information explaining an item in the sentence is about to be discussed. On the left side of a colon, you should always have a complete sentence. On the right side, you may or may not see a complete sentence.

Dan packed his camping supplies: a tent, a sleeping bag, and some water.

--Notice how the list of information on the right is explaining supplies.

Tina has a great idea: the students could hold a fundraiser.

--This example shows two complete sentences, but the sentence on the right explains "idea" from the first part.

Another way to think about colons is to consider them a replacement for the words "which are" or "such as." Remember, if you use a colon, you should avoid using those words since you would be repeating yourself.

In preparation for dinner, we spent all day making three sides, which were a salad, macaroni and cheese, and an apple pie.

Or

In preparation for dinner, we spent all day making three sides: a salad, macaroni and cheese, and an apple pie.

An em-dash, or sometimes called an m-dash, is created either by placing two hyphens together or having a single line that is about the same length as the letter M, hence the name m-dash. Often, computer programs will automatically merge two hyphens into a single line. Either is acceptable, usually, but always make sure you are consistent with your choice.

I often consider an m-dash to be the wild card of punctuation. It can often take the place of other pieces of punctuation, including a comma, a period, a semicolon, or a colon. However, m-dashes are considered informal, so you should try to avoid them in academic writing.

--Each of the following sentences is grammatically correct but can be read slightly differently.

Bob didn't arrive--he was in a terrible accident.

--The em-dash, in theory, connects the ideas without taking a breath or a pause because it's so urgent.

Bob didn't arrive. He was in a terrible accident.

--A period lets the reader take a breath, pause, build tension, or even suggest the accident was not the reason he didn't arrive. It's almost a secondary thought.

Bob didn't arrive; he was in a terrible accident.

--The semicolon suggests this is a formal piece of writing and serious. There's a slight hiccup when reads run across the semicolon, but not as much as a period.

Bob didn't arrive because he was in a terrible accident

--The use of "because" spells out the connection of ideas to the reader very clearly, but it uses more words and takes more time to process.

Ellipses suggest information has been left out. You should never use them in your own academic writing because they suggest a writer has forgotten what he or she meant to say. If you're writing a paper, you should know exactly what you want to say.

However, ellipses are sometimes used in professional writing to leave out information in quotations. Sometimes a quote will be extra long and not fully connected to the subject matter. There is an argument against using them in such a way, though, which is if ellipses cut out information from a quote, the user of the quote might be taking the information out of context or misrepresenting the original speaker.

Whenever I see ellipses, I always have to wonder what information am I not being shown and why am I not seeing it. I tend to distrust ellipses.

Here is a simple example of readers not being able to verify the removed information of the sentence:

"Pittsburgh is...a wonderful place to live."

--which could mean--

"Pittsburgh is not a wonderful place to live."

Versus

"Pittsburgh is a city in Pennsylvania and a wonderful place to live."

I usually recommend trying to avoid ellipses.

I don't want to lie to all of you. Citations can be confusing.

I like to try to put them in perspective, though.

We are using MLA 9th Edition formatting style, which gives some ground rules for handling cited information, but we need to remember it's just a recommendation. There are so many sources in the world a single guide can't possibly explain how to do them all, which means citation guides try to lay some ground rules for writers to use.

For instance, once at a writing center, I had a student ask me how to cite an unusual source:

A commencement speech that was never given-->It was published in a newspaper-->the newspaper was several hundred years old-->An image of the speech in the paper was republished in his textbook.

MLA guidelines will explain how to handle a speech, a newspaper, and a textbook, but not a speech in a newspaper reprinted in a textbook. We had to use the basic guidelines to create our own documentation, he asked his teacher for verification, and everyone was happy.

With that said, the main rule is to explain to your readers where the information is coming. Imagine you're writing to be a conversation with someone, and in a conversation if you reference a movie, a song, or something a friend said, you would explain where the reference came from. In other words, we don't just quote movies and jokes then pretend we made them up ourselves.

When citing there are two places to include information: where you use the referenced information in your essay and in the works cited.

What to use where you reference the information:

Indicate whatever is used first in the works cited page. Usually, the last name of the author is key. If there is no author, you might use the title of the source. Note, an author is not necessarily an editor.

What to use in your works cited:

This is where you can use your book's guidance, the MLA handbook if you have one, or websites like Purdue's OWL

Links to an external site.

. It will layout the possible sources and the information needed.

You can also try citation creators like EasyBib

Links to an external site.

or Citation Machine

Links to an external site.

. If you use these, though, please enter the information manually. The automatic citation creator almost never works correctly, which causes students to cite incorrect sources and lose points.

Usually, you'll find an order of these three items first, if they exist:

Last Name of Author, First Name. "Title of Story or Article." Title of the Book or Website in which the Source was Published.

After that information, you put different information based on the source.

Take a look at the links, practice creating a works cited page, and move on to the next page where I talk about the I.C.E. method using citations.