Human Resources

Manager’s Hot Seat

Case 10: Diversity: Mediating Morality

The Meeting

S: OK, before we begin gentlemen, I want to remind the both of you that the purpose of this meeting is for us to discuss how to get this project completed, how to get the work done, and nothing else. With that said, what has happened Daniel, is that Bob and I have met and talked about what the best way is for his team to proceed and to figure out how to get their portion done. What he has agreed to do, and I think this is a good opportunity for 2 members of his staff to step up to the plate for the first time, is to delegate certain portions of his work to Ralph and Jennifer. They will pick up those portions and complete the remaining work. Is that right? Do I have that right?

B: That’s it, that’s what we talked about.

S: Do you have any questions Daniel?

D: Well I have a problem with that.

S: OK, let’s talk about why.

D: What I do have a problem with is that, him discriminating against me because I’m a gay man and you’re failing to see what he is doing and compromising here and letting it happen. That’s what I’m having a problem with.

S: I’m going to say this once, and I hope that you will both hear me. This is a place of equal opportunity, regardless of race, gender, and sexual orientation. This is not a situation that I am going to let affect that. I’m not going to let neither your personal life nor your sexual orientation affect your standing in the company, your day to day work, your evaluations, your ability...

D: But you are letting it affect it. You’re letting his personal opinion affect a working relationship. So how can you say you are not going to let that happen when you are letting it happen?

S: OK, let me ask you a question. Daniel, what would you like me to do?

D: Figure out a solution where we can work together and finish this project like we had so many times before he realized I was gay.

S: Let me ask you a question. Suppose you have someone working with you who you simply don’t like for whatever reason. It would be irresponsible for me, as your manager, to say to you I would like you to work with this person on a day to day basis regardless of your feelings, your situation or your preferences, especially if there was another equally viable alternative. Do you agree?

D: The point is, is that Bob has decided because I am a gay man that he doesn’t want to work with me. Now we are not going to work together, and he is going to work with someone else and finish the project. Don’t you know that that is going to be a cycle of effects amongst other workers in the company? You know, now here is Bob, he found out that another man that he was working with in the company is gay so he decided that he didn’t want to work with that person. Syl Okayed that, and worked out a situation. I think the thing is, and the point that is missing is that the man that has the problem here is probably the man that has to go and have some counselling.

S: OK Daniel.

B: I think it’s interesting who needs the counselling.

S: OK, stop! There will be no personal attacks in this meeting.

B: There has been nothing but personal attacks in the last five minutes.

S: Voices are raised; there will be no personal attacks.

B: Regardless of whether voices are raised or not, so you’re missing a fundamental point here. He is been on the attack for five minutes, very calmly but it’s an attack.

S: You need to calm down.

D: The attack happened last week Bob, when you decided that you didn’t want to work with me.

S: OK, if this meeting is going to continue at this level, and at this tone, I’m going to ask to meet with each of you individually. We will work this out separately. We are not going to have an argument here.

B: Syl, you gave me an opportunity to decide how to proceed with the project. I did that. And now he won’t go along with it. I’m willing to proceed with them as…

S: Enough. Enough. What is going to take place is Bob is going to take this opportunity to go to Ralph and Jennifer, and we have agreed that he is going to explain to them that this is an opportunity for them to step up as a pure business standpoint to the project to do their part. There is not going to be a discussion of anybody’s personal life, at all.

D: There has already been a discussion. There has been a decision made based on his personal opinion about me.

S: Daniel, there is absolutely nothing…

D: So why all of a sudden has it become something where we are not going to discuss it, when all you’re saying is as a result of…

S: Bob has agreed that he’s not… This discussion that has taken place here is not going to be discussed with Ralph, it is not going to be discussed with Jennifer, and it is not going to be discussed outside the guise of this office. Is that right Bob?

B: That’s absolutely right.

D: Oh, yeah, right, right, right. Yeah I believe that.

S: OK, then I’m going to back to my original suggestion Daniel. I’m going to ask you to come up with an alternative. I have given Bob the opportunity to come up with an alternative, and this is his alternative solution. You don’t like it, so I’m going to give you the same opportunity. This discussion is very heated. I don’t…

D: This company has discriminated against me because Bob has decided not work with me because I’m a gay man.

S: Daniel, I’m going to say this once, and I’m not going to say it again. This discussion is very heated, and I would like for us to calm down.

D: I’m not very heated about it.

S: OK, you’re interrupting me, so it is heated.

D: OK, I see where the heat is coming from, go ahead.

S: What I would like for us to do, is for the both of you to calm down, and for you to think about it over the weekend. Over the weekend, you think about it and then come back to me with your proposal and we will think about it. OK?

Afterthoughts

S: It’s a tough situation because actually, Daniel has a point. Bob probably is going to in fact not keep his mouth shut. No matter what resolution comes of it, because of his feelings that morality has a place in the workplace, it is going to come out. So it’s a tough situation because you have to balance out getting the job done, which is to get the project done on time, and figure out how to deal with the personal issues. Daniel is going to possibly even bring a discrimination suit, or feel discriminated against. Bob is going to talk to who knows who at the company about Daniels personal life. There probably isn’t even an actual discrimination case because there has to be a situation where his career is adversely affected. If the project comes in on time and they get a good review on the project, no matter how the other team decides to execute it, will not affect Daniel’s career. He does feel discriminated against, and he does have a right to that opinion. It would be an ideal if Bob could either go to counselling or sensitivity training or directed to be more accepting, or less judgmental and less opposing of his personal viewpoints but there are simply employees who are going to bring their personal stance into the workplace and there is nothing you can do about that.