hi I just want someone to correct any grammars mistakes I have made in my personal statement I am using to apply

Question

hi I just want someone to correct any grammars mistakes I have made in my personal statement I am using to apply

to to college. It should be quick and easy since I have already passed by several people.

My introduction to Mechanical Engineering came about through my fascination with Astronomy and realising that astronomical instruments are designed by Mechanical Engineers. The workings of rocket engines and robots added fuel to my enthusiasm to learn about design and manufacturing technologies. I believe mechanical engineering is the most important work a person can be involved in, shaping the future using new technologies such as 3D  printing and designing machines and maintaining the ones we depend on so much. I am excited to develop my physics and maths knowledge, because even though it is interesting to learn about Pascal's Principle, using it to design a hydraulic cylinder and calculate the outcome, is what matters the most.

I want to go into the Aerospace Industry and hope to contribute to the civilian space travel sector, where Virgin Air and Blue Origin have made pioneering starts. I spend a lot of time on simulation software, like KERBAL where I design and simulate machines in virtual reality which obey the physical and mechanical laws. I am exited to learn how to use professional simulation tools such CAD so I can design with 100% accuracy to the real world.  I enjoy problem-solving and always try to improve my technique by solving puzzles from books such as "My Best Mathematical and Logic Puzzles" by Martin Garden. I also have improved my studying and note taking techniques and continue to do so by taking online courses.

I recently found the Institution of Mechanical Engineers, and I have booked to attend lectures to help me view the industry from a more business oriented perspective and to hear others experience and advice, and begin networking early. I hope to join the course and if you give me a chance I will take full advantage of the course and extracurricular activities. I assure you that I will work hard and shine as one of your top students, trying to fulfill my aim and goal of being a Mechanical Engineer of the future.

My Introduction to Mechanical Engineering came through my fascination for Astronomy andrealizing that astronomical instruments are usually designed by Mechanical Engineers. The workings ofrocket...