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Please correct errors as instructed in the text.I'm (this author is – two things here – 1. avoid use of first person (me, I, my as much as possible). 2. Do not use contractions (“I’m,” ”wo

Please correct errors as instructed in the text.

I'm (this author is – two things here – 1. avoid use of first person (me, I, my as much as possible). 2. Do not use contractions (“I’m,” ”won’t,” etc.) currently pursuing my master’s in forensic psychology (please go back and read how to format degree titles in my discussion post) and, (I have posted a presentation on commas in an announcement – please review) the expected date of graduation is in 2020. Although I'm giving myself until 2021 to complete the program fully due to life circumstances (this is not a complete sentence; it is a dependent clause. It can be part of a full sentence or restructured to stand on its own – “Although I'm giving myself until 2021 to complete the program fully due to life circumstances, I could graduate as early as fall 2020.” or “I expect life circumstances to delay my graduation until fall 2021.”). I'm a single mom (mother – avoid colloquialisms) of two girls, and I have an elderly grandmother and mother that who I look after when they develop health crises. 

I chose this degree program due to my because I love of all aspects of psychology. I love trying to get to the root cause of the mind (this phrase was confusing “cause” suggests a problem, perhaps “the root causes of mental health problems” or “trying to understand how the mind functions.”) and, thepotential reasons why people do the things they do. After studying psychology in my undergraduate years, it seems like the natural progression to gain more insight into the profession. 

With this degree, I will be able to market myself to a broader venue range of professions, so that I will not get burnt out with one aspect of psychology. For example, with forensic psychology, I can freely move from a job with the legal system to a hospital setting.  

The San Francisco (not relevant – be careful of being too wordy) news article, written by Jon Swartz,’ (this is a single quotation mark – should be double)Privacy Breached in Facebook”,  (punctuation should be inside quotation marks) is to informs Facebook users of a potential breach of their personal identifying information. Facebook user’s information is said to have been transmitted to dozens of advertising and tracking companies (Swartz ( (this should be a comma between author and date, not an opening parenthesis) 2010). The purpose of the article is to inform users of potential flaws in Facebook systems, thus allowing hackers to break into private account ID’s information (do not use abbreviations),  and (there are only two things in this list – use and instead of comma) to sell the user’s information to internet tracking, and advertising companies Swartz (2010) (Swartz, 2010).  The writer implies, with the words “imbroglio” and “snafu,” (even single words should use quotation marksthat Facebook executives have a lack of knowledge, are confused, and should be embarrassed for not understanding the intricacies of their software(add a citation for a quote here in the format: (author, date, page/paragraph number).  He also implies that Facebook’s privacy standards are messy, confusing, and in a chaotic state.

The intended audience is individuals using social networking, and media services (only use comma before and in a series of three items or between two independent clauses – see the presentation on commas that I posted).  The relationship between a news article and the genre of the article is that both inform, establishes an open relationship with its intended audience, discussespresent or recent news information and events, and both can be entertaining (a citation would have been good here).  Evidence shown is presented by “The Wall Street Journal” (use italics instead of quotations for books, newspapers, movies),a worldwide newspaper known for its thoroughness in reporting news and winning the Pulitzer Prize, (an award for American achievement in journalism) (The Wall Street Journal n.d. I do not know what this citation represents – because you did not include the title or URL in the refernce below, I cannot help correct this))  Privacy advocates ensures that privacy is maintained.  The 56 million subscribers possibly affected by Facebook possible information breach show the magnitude of a possible design flaw in Facebook’s system.

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