Please review my short story. Do you understand it? It was a new era in the country of Backa. The king had appointed the new soldiers that would proudly serve the mingy little desert nation with fulfi

Please review my short story. Do you understand it?

It was a new era in the country of Backa. The king had appointed the new soldiers that would proudly serve the mingy little desert nation with fulfilment in battles. Eighty zestful and spirited spirited men who had undergone years of mental and physical armed forces training in the harsh arid desert would finally travel hundreds of miles away to battle their long-standing rive, Porta, for the one hundredth time.

Backa was a nation of achievement, having won every battle with its rival, Porta. The king of Backa was almost certain that their soldiers would return to the nation with victory. But people knew that this year was going to be different. A few days prior, the king of Backa received a threatening message from the king of Porta, reading “our soldiers have learnt their lessons over generations in the past one hundred years, this year, it will be different, our soldiers are metal steel, they’ll kill any one of your soldiers in a second, we now have double the amount of soldiers in each base and double the amount of weapons, and most importantly, we have double the amount of intelligence than your gronks, so be prepared for us to claim victory.” This message made the king state a warning to the soldiers before the battle “I am warning you, every one of you will serve side by side, with harmony, partnership, synergy and unity, not one, not two, but all of you, with teamwork, this year’s battle will be a crucial one, this battle will be our one hundreth victory in a row if we win, so make it a battle to remember”

It was a new morning, and the families and friends of Porta waved goodbye to the one hundred battle team that would battle Porta. The five thousand ardent soldiers, dressed in chocolate brown and tree green uniforms boarded the armed train to take them to the battlefield. The battlefield was not known as the “battlefield” by Backa’s soldiers, but as the “deathfield” due to its extremely harsh, arid and dusty environment. The train journey would take a sweaty long ten days.

It was day ten. Roger, woke up everyone on the rattly train by pouring ice-cold water on each and every one of the soldiers. He shouted “we are approaching the battlefield, arm your weapons and get united” But not all soldiers were united. Blope, who was Roger’s deputy officer, had enough of Roger and his leadership. Blope was known to spread false information with his fellow soldiers about Roger, and had shown ambitions to become the Chief Officer himself．

It was battle time. The sound of swords scratching and soldiers screeching were common.  Backa’s team has already put down four soldiers from Porta’s team in under two minutes. Within two hours, forty soldiers from Porta had been down and Roger was the person that was praised for Backa’s successful start to the battle. Backa’s soldiers made their way to their sleeping dorms with pride and with a sense of satisfaction among every soldier, but Blope. Blope believed that Roger didn’t deserve all the credit and he did.

It was just approaching midnight, where every soldier was getting well-deserved sleep, when Blope woke up, determined to take over. Blope picked up a spare sword and made his way towards Roger’s sleeping berth, smashed open the door and powerfully threw the sword at Roger’s neck before running back to bed.

It was just ten minutes before five in the morning, and Blope woke up, ready to make an announcement of last night’s tragic incident, pretending that one of Porta’s soldiers broke in to the sleeping dorm complex and killed Roger. Bloke stated “It was a tragic event last night, a corrupt soldier from Porta’s army broke in and sadly killed Roger, therefore, I will take over as Chief Officer”

“Right, lads, as I am your new Chief Officer and therefore you must abide by my rules or you run the risk of being kicked out.” Blope commanded all soldiers to take all their swords and fight. “What about our shields to defend ourselves?” said a fellow soldier. “No shields, because I will use all of your shields to go on an individual mission myself and defeat Porta in a way which none of you are capable of, so you chaps stay on the battlefield and I’ll do something special, now get on the battlefield”

“But we won’t  know what to do if we don’t have a Chief officer,” said another soldier. “NO BUTS, you chaps know what to do, we have won this battle ninety-nine times and it is impossible for any one of you to die, so get on the battlefield right now before I kill one of you. We have done this before, so use your pride and kill ‘em”

Without any instructions or tactics from Blope, the army was forced to rush onto the battlefield to fight Porter's forces, while Blope decided to climb a tall, harsh mountain so he could get a good view of the battlefield from the top and enjoy Porta’s soldiers getting killed for the one hundredth time.

But he didn’t get to see that.

By the time Blope had got to the top of the mountain to see Backa’s soldiers claiming victory for the one hundredth time, he was flabbergasted to see hundreds of Backa’s soldiers floating in red blood while Porta claimed victory. Blope immediately rushed his way down before crashing into a red blood pool of dead Backa soldiers. Wanting to know what happened, Blope made his way to Porta’s army to see what just happened that made him gobsmacked. 

Porta’s Chief officer laughed when Blope asked what happened “your soldiers were literally walking, what would you expect from an army that doesn’t have any coordination and walks around like headless camels?”

Blope was about to board the train  back to Porta, but realised that there would be thousands of people and families, along with the king, ready to greet him. Blope immediately ran for his life in a straight line away from the train, until he perished to death.